guns and trains

guns and trains


​i remember how close
the edge of the platform was
and the third rail below.
jump
said the voice in my head
jump.
i felt my feet about to leave
the yellow caution strip and then
the train
grazing my forehead.

guns and trains the nurse says
(sighing)
are the surest path to suicide.
gets them
almost
every time.

waiting for the train now
i’m watching all of you.
i have found the emergency disconnect
just in case.
step back a little.

i can’t bear
the light coming
ever brighter
sweating heat
and the possibilities
evaporating
from your damp face.