recovery
i lost the slip of paper with our appointment, i lost my keys, my wallet went missing i forgot to pay the credit card bill and the cable. i’m tired. i’m tired and worried about the credit card bill and the children and work and the possibility that humanity might destroy ourselves, that phone call that flash of pain her hand and the world and the article i just wrote might be awful. but there are no pills in the cabinet. no ativan, no xanax, no klonopin no vicodin, no percocet, no nothing. and there are no bottles on the shelf, no vodka or gin or anything stronger than lemonade. there are not even any cigarettes in my back pocket. this is tough, this straight up morning. i would rather get high than cry and cry. i would rather wake up and not remember. but when you kissed me on your way out the door i thought i’d really like to see you tonight. so i’ll make do with sour candy and coffee. but you better buy tissues on your way home.
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August 2020
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